How to make a Christmastime Birthday Special

My daughter was born on December 28 - right between holidays and in the middle of the week when most people are absolutely exhausted and tired of the hustle-bustle and socializing. I wasn't sure how to celebrate that first year - how could we make her birthday feel set apart and special?

I received a gift that December - the gift of a great idea - and it’s given us a creative way to slip into birthday mode in the midst of the holidays.

It’s the Birthday Tree.

On Abby’s birthday each year, I take the Christmas ornaments off the tree and transform it into the Birthday Tree. The first few years I bought new ribbon and shimmering balls in the theme colors.

On her first birthday, the theme was Angels:

I found ribbon in soft pastels with hints of golden glitter. Guests brought an angel ornament and I added in the ornaments we already had that referenced angels. I love this picture because the painting in the background was me, painted by my grandmother but it looked so much like Abby - she thought it was her for years!

Vintage angel cake toppers, wooden angels from our whirligig, angel tree ornaments and mercury glass candles surround the homemade carrot cake.

Birthday #2 was a vintage 1940’s theme. I chose ribbon in patterns and colors that referenced our favorite children's books from that era.

Birthday #3 was the Princess Birthday and Abby was ready to help decorate her tree - so much fun!!

Birthday #4 was a polka dot theme - all the ribbons were spotted and wrapping paper too! On this birthday, I decorated with old photos of the birthday girl.

Another year, the theme was ballet to match her passion for dance and the kids were all old enough to help make a Bûche de Noël for her.

As Abby got older, we reused some of these original ribbons, mixing them and hanging what felt right that year. We decorated with the ornaments she had received each year. Some years there was more of a theme than others. As I look back, there are a few years when we didn't make much of the birthday tree and there are no photos.

One year, when life circumstances had made the holidays particularly painful for me, I took the Christmas tree and decorations down right after Christmas (I needed it to be over) and made the Birthday Tree out of a large branch from our yard. It felt like a fresh start to a new year as well as a special “tree” for my girl.

When my kids were babies, I made up little songs for them. Abby’s was sung to the tune of Hark the Herald Angels Sing perhaps because she came at Christmastime. I’ll never forget the look on her face at the age of 3 when we were sitting in church and she heard the entire congregation singing “her song”. There is joy to be found in the imperfect and having a birthday at the holidays is one of those lovely limitations that inspires creativity.

I’m not sure yet what this year’s theme will be - perhaps Hygge, since my girl is now 13 and loves that style. Looks like I’ll be shopping the after Christmas sales to find little wooden ornaments and creamy neutral textures.

Do you have a family birthday during the holidays? What has your family done to make it feel special?

Homemade Advent Calendars

Happy December 1st!! Can you believe it’s here already?? We put our tree up last night - the earliest date ever for our family and I’m loving it! I’m ready for the music, the cookie-making, the Advent season at church, and that joyful energy of anticipation and celebration.

Today I’m sharing a sweet tradition - making homemade paper Advent calendars.

Years ago, I found a cardstock template with the little windows already cut out but that product hasn’t been available for awhile, so my kids have been making their own. Here’s how we do it…

1) Use the back of an old advent calendar as a template, tracing the little window openings.

2) Using an exacto knife and a self-healing mat, carefully cut along the lines, leaving one side still attached.

3) Turn the page over so the pencil lines won’t show.

4) Use high quality colored pencils to create a design that covers the entire front of the paper. Christmas books, cards or magazines can inspire the design as well as favorite things like sports teams or pets.

This one tells the Christmas story…

This one reveals what was top of mind for my 10 year old boy one year…

5) Number your windows.

6) Place a matching - sized sheet of paper underneath and trace the shape of the windows onto it.

7) Decorate the bottom page so little images or words fill the places the windows will reveal when opened.

8) Use a permanent glue stick to seal the two pages together.

9) Hang your Advent calendar and open the numbered windows for December 1-25.

Here’s Abby’s for this Christmas.

Have FUN and take JOY, friends!! Let me see what your kids make - in the comments here or on Instagram Merry Christmas!!

Mitten Strings Mindset

One of the most influential books in all my parenting life has been “Mitten Strings for God” by Katrina Kenison. The tagline is “Reflections for Mothers in a Hurry” and those bits of wisdom, shared so beautifully, were exactly what I needed as a young mother of 5 when I first read it years ago. With chapter titles like, “Peace”, “Dailiness” and “Simplicity”, Katrina’s experience spoke straight to my heart with understanding about what I faced but also encouragement to be more mindful about my choices as a parent. I’m forever grateful for that guidance from a mom who had gone before me.

And so, as I seek to connect with and encourage young moms, I must share this book. At the time of this post, we are entering the holiday season. I can’t imagine a better time to lock arms as mothers and think about the choices we are making for our children. How we are spending our time and our money? What really is most important? How can we enjoy these years and find true JOY in them?

I would LOVE for you to JOIN ME for the next 30 days and, whether you just listen in or jump into the conversation, I hope that Katrina’s words and my interpretation of them speaks to your heart and encourages you! Watch the brief welcome video below and consider following along.

It’s so simple to participate in my book study - Just sign up HERE and you’ll get a daily email with the video of the day - a short 5-7 minutes of me sharing my favorite tidbits from the book, chapter by chapter. You will have access to all the videos as long as the course is on my site along with a place to comment, connect, ask questions and gain encouragement. It’s completely FREE.

You don’t need to purchase the book to participate but there is so much goodness in it that I cannot cover in our short videos, it would be a great addition to your parenting library if your budget allows. (Yes, the link to the right is an affiliate link which I hope will eventually help me continue to create fun things for moms.)

I wish for you much JOY as you love and connect with the children in your life.

Warmly,

Jill

Mitten Strings for God: Reflections for Mothers in a Hurry

By Katrina Kenison

3 Steps to Changing your Home Decor without Creating more Clutter

The best method I know for successfully changing out your home decor for a new season involves just a few steps:

1) Create a blank slate. I got this idea from The Nester, who calls it Quieting the Room. She talks about it brilliantly here and here and also in her books, The Nesting Place and The Cozy Minimalist. Basically, you remove everything from the surfaces along with pillows and seasonal items, leaving only the foundational pieces - furniture, rugs, tables, lamps, etc…

In this room, I’ve left the items that won’t be changing.

2) Find something that speaks to you. Let it be the inspiration for the season’s decor.

In this case, perhaps the metal and wood of the lantern will set the tone and other items will follow the theme of metal and wood…

Or maybe this little vintage Santa will inspire the feel of your home this year…

This colorful item was brought into our home after the holidays last winter. It became the jumping off point for the stying of our red hutch.

Every item here was chosen with inspiration from the rooster on wood print.

So, in this case, I bought the rooster print (50% off at Hobby Lobby) then found decor items that I already owned to go with it. Check your stash of stuff before you buy more.

Before you head out to buy more stuff, check your stash of decor items. Taking the time to organize it by material (metal, ceramic, wood) will make choosing items easier.

3) Add a little bit at a time, rather than in a mad rush, so you can be creative. Holiday decorating does not have to mean pulling out everything in your red and green tubs. Slow down and see what feels right this year. The Nester talks about this HERE. Perhaps some branches from the yard or the extra boughs left over at the Christmas tree lot will serve as decor, filling the room with texture from nature.

All of this aligns with slowing down bit, making things simple and being mindful about what we let into our homes. I’m currently sharing a book that I’ve loved over the years about finding joy in the simple things. You can read about it HERE.

You are the home - maker. You set the tone. Have FUN. Be CREATIVE. Take JOY.

Jill

The Lonely Scarecrow

Since I can’t help but read children’s picture books ANY time of the year and ESPECIALLY not in Fall, here’s another installment in the series, Through the Seasons with Children’s Literature - Fall edition. This week’s book is Tim Preston’s “The Lonely Scarecrow” which I bought for the gorgeous cover, but fell in love with for the sweet story and Maggie Kneen’s vibrant illustrations. They are done in a raised texture which children (and adults) can’t resist touching. I’ve written some lesson plans and ideas for using this book with your children so you can create memories around another Fall favorite.

I also recorded another video of me reading the story, so if you’d like 8 free minutes, mama, you can park your littles in front of the video and I’ll entertain them. Or perhaps YOU need someone to read YOU a story? Then, cuddle up and I’ll read to you too.

Children can narrate the story by writing or drawing what they remember or, if they aren’t yet writers, dictating it to you. I’ve also had students create their own scarecrow with colored pencils, scraps of fabric, etc… Here’s an example…

The Lonely Scarecrow

By Tim Preston, Maggie Kneen

Strathmore 500 Series Visual Mixed Media Journal, 9"x12" Vellum, Wire Bound, 34 Sheets

Pro-Art

Enjoy this sweet book! Next week I’ll post one about Thanksgiving and then, (oh my!) we’ll be ready to look at holiday books! Happy reading!

xo

Jill

Through the Seasons with Children's Literature - Fall

My children are no longer little. We don’t cuddle up on the sofa and read picture books every day anymore. But sometimes we still do. Yes, even at 12, 14, 16, 18, and 20 years old, they will sprawl out - long arms and legs spilling onto the floor and listen to one of our old favorites - for two reasons:

1) We have deep memories attached to these stories.

2) The best children’s literature is just as much fun to read as an adult as it was when one was a child. Sometimes it’s even better.

If I could recommend ONE activity that positively shaped our family life over the years, it would be reading together. Cuddling up together to share stories created connections, instilled shared memories, produced inside jokes, awakened imagination, inspired play, developed grammar and writing abilities, and cemented a love of learning in all of us. Choosing “living books” as educator Charlotte Mason called them made all the difference.

A living book is one that is beautifully written and that contains thoughtful ideas. It inspires deep thinking and fosters an attitude of wonder, causing us to find connections to other ideas and to see the world differently.

All this from well-chosen picture books? Yes.

Today, I’m sharing one of our favorite Fall read-alouds, a living book on many levels, “The Apple Pie that Papa Baked” written by Lauren Thompson and, just as importantly, illustrated by Jonathan Bean.

I’m also sharing my lesson plans for this book so you can simply read it to your children or also extend that activity in several beneficial and FUN ways.

1) Sit together and read the story. Isn't it sweet? Go slow enough that your children can observe the details in the illustrations. Some of the story is told with illustrations alone. You might let your children “tell” you the story found in the pictures. Don't make it a quiz. Just enjoy the story together. Let them react in their own way - there are no right answers. In fact, they might notice something that you didn’t see.

2) Read it again (in the same sitting or later), noticing the rhythm and repetition in the story. You might use your voice to emphasize how it builds. Don’t talk about the rhythm, just read it in a way that makes it evident.

3) Art: Notice the illustrations - they are made with woodcut printing. From here, you can either find other examples of woodcut artwork or, when you encounter it in other places, see if your children make the connection. “This reminds me of ________.” is a valuable line of thinking to use across all of life.

4) Grammar: Read it another time, emphasizing the ADJECTIVES with your voice.

5) Read it on another occasion, this time, leaving out the adjectives without telling your children you are doing so. They will notice and it will be funny! Talk about adjectives. “An adjective is a word that describes a noun.” Do the adjectives make the story better? You can extend this activity throughout your life this week. Ask your child to be more descriptive by asking, “What kind of __________?” or “Which one?” about everyday things. Whenever they speak a noun, ask for more detail. This will become a silly game, an inside joke, a point of camaraderie and connection with your children.

“How was the car ride?” “Long and boring.”

What kind of orange was it? “Juicy and sweet.”

What is your coach like? “Tall and kind.”

Which sweatshirt would you like to wear? “ - the one that is blue, warm and cozy.”

You can take this grammar lesson as far as you want. We got to the point where we were assigning a part of speech to each kid who was piled on the sofa when we read this story. I was the narrator and one kid would speak all the nouns, one only the adjectives, one the verbs, one the prepositions, one the articles, etc…. It was hilarious! And it was grammar.

6) Do an activity together: Go apple picking. Eat some apples, Make an apple pie.

Isn’t it amazing how much we can do with just ONE beautifully written children’s book? I’d love to hear what ideas you come up with to extend this story into other areas of life and learning. Share with us in the comments below.

At the very least, read this story, cuddled up with your children. Let the rhythm and the illustrations comfort and entertain. Enjoy it!

While your local library might have a copy, this is a great one to own. Here’s a link…

The Apple Pie That Papa Baked

By Lauren Thompson

If your children would like to hear it read by me - here’s a 7 minute clip. I’ll try to keep them entertained and, If you hurry, you might just get a shower in today! Run!!

Make your Home Cozy - Fall Edition

One of my favorite things to do is to decorate my home. The process never looks like a designer’s dream though. Almost never has it involved buying new furniture or high end decor. I’ve had the pleasure of investing in a few big ticket items over my 25 years of creating a home, like sofas and some bedroom furniture, but the rest has been gathered over time and had a home before it belonged to us. In fact, everything I learned about creating a cozy home for my family came from working within my limitations. In the early years, I would buy a gallon of paint to refresh a room since we could never replace or remodel anything. I would move the few furniture items we had to new places, trying desperately to get the look I wanted. Often I would throw my hands up in the air and, half laughing/half crying, declare that I was just rearranging the garage sale display!

Nowadays, my house is furnished with a few things we bought new, most that I gathered used and a collection of inexpensive decor collected or made over time. I remember when I was young wondering how in the world my mother in law had managed to collect so many beautiful things - books, plates, candles and other decor items. Her home and cabinets were a treasure trove of beautlful things. I loved it all! I know now that 25 years into the homemaking gig, if you’ve gathered little things you love here and there, that you can have a collection of meaningful items that are beautiful and special to you and that it will be better then all new, all-at-once, on trend everything.

So now, when the seasons change and I have time to putter around the house changing up the decor, it’s still not perfect or new or on trend but each little item I put out is special, curated and full of memories. Here are a few vignettes I created this week in our home. For more ideas, grab my FREE Guide: 4 Ways to Create a Home you Love.

A favorite children’s book, pewter pieces from a dear friend, a photo of my children when they were little, old books from a neighbor’s yard sale, yarn wreath made by my daughter, an old French drawer, an old oil can, and a card from Trader Joe’s taped to a frame.

Tabletop beauty: wooden tray - Southern Living Home, old books from neighbor’s yard sale, antique shoe mold - a gift from my sister, a German beer stein, green balls from Homegoods, real white pumpkins from Trader Joe’s.

A few touches of Fall color change this room with the season. The striped chair is a roadside find with a PB curtain over it. Curtains - calico corners fabric sewn by a friend, end table, lamp, bust - consignment, oil painting by my grandmother, sofa - Flexsteel, pillows, rug and coffee table - Pottery Barn, string lights because we don’t have overhead lighting.

Watercolor of Mt. Diablo and frame was a gift from a sweet family member, fabric pumpkin made by my girls. Real pumpkins from Trader Joe’s.

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One of the people who has influenced my style and more importantly, helped me LOVE my imperfect home is Myquillan Smith - aka, The Nester. I found her blog about 10 years ago during a time when my kids were little, the days were long and we were renting a run down old ranch house. We had no money to make it pretty. I’ll never forget the first of her blog posts that I read. It was about making window “mistreatments” and it involved her standing on her kitchen counter and using her shoe to pound a nail through a piece of fabric to make a curtain for her kitchen window. I was inspired and I no longer felt alone.

She talked about “lovely limitations” and quoted Henri Matisse: “Much of the beauty that arises in art comes from the struggle an artist wages with his limited medium.” Amen. Eventually, she wrote a book sharing her tips and wisdom around creating a lovely home. You can order it HERE:

The Nesting Place: It Doesn’t Have to Be Perfect to Be Beautiful

By Myquillyn Smith

She uses a great hashtag on Instagram: #idhtbptbb - it doesn’t have to be perfect to be beautiful. Isn’t that so true??

It took an attitude shift for me to start appreciating the simple little things I’d been able to gather over the years to not dismiss them as junk or not “real decor”. The whole purpose of creating beauty in our homes should be to tell a story, to remind us of moments and experiences and to invite us to engage in the most meaningful activities. It doesn’t matter that a chair came from the side of the road - it matters that people have a place to sit.

The Nester’s latest book is about creating a beautiful home without so much STUFF. I’m reading an advance copy right now and I love it. It’s available for pre-order and there are some great bonuses if you pre-order by a certain date.

Cozy Minimalist Home: More Style, Less Stuff

By Myquillyn Smith

I hope you feel encouraged and empowered to embrace the imperfect and use what you have to create a home your family loves. For more ideas, grab my FREE Guide: 4 Ways to Create a Home you Love.

Fix It Mama

When I was a little girl, my parents took really good care of me. I had chores - but they were the obvious ones like make your bed, pick up your clothes, vacuum, and mow the lawn. I had no idea that there were so many more responsibilities that came with owning a home or running one. I liked cooking and I had watched my mom clean house - so I knew the basics. My dad even taught us to do our own taxes. But what I had not been trained to do was to manage it all. The behind the scenes stuff (at least it seemed that way to me) like changing batteries in smoke detectors, replacing lightbulbs, cleaning gutters, fixing sprinklers, troubleshooting electrical issues or basic plumbing - well, my daddy did those things, quietly and without fanfare. That was his job as the man of the house and it was his way of taking care of us. I didn't know it then, but as an adult, I would have the opportunity to learn many of those skills on my own.

Now, let me back up a bit. I was not always grateful for that opportunity. In fact I spent most of my adult life, even as a very responsible mother of 5 wondering, when a certain household maintenance issue came up, “Where is my daddy?” I would seriously have a little pity party - a full blown, “I shouldn’t have to learn these things! I don’t have time for this!” hissy fit inside my head.  I wondered when someone was going to show up to fix things. I would ignore the broken sprinkler or the leaking toilet and wallow in my feminine helplessness. Completely overwhelmed, I would convince myself that it was impossible that I should have to be skilled in all of these things when I was already the homeschooling, cooking, planning, shopping, coordinating, chauffeuring, business owning woman of the house. “Isn't there a man around who will take care of these things for me?” I would wonder. “Certainly I’m entitled to that!” I would pout internally for days, disgruntled that I didn’t have household staff to do these things for me, until inevitably that voice inside would finally say, “No one is coming to save you, dear. It’s just a broken sprinkler and you can google how to fix that. So figure it out. You’ve got this.” And there is something that happens in the moments when you are digging a muddy hole or reaching into the toilet tank to replace a broken part. You realize that you CAN do it. It’s NOT that big a deal. The guy at Ace Hardware is your friend, the internet is your helper, and you are more capable than you think. 

So I’m grateful that I’m not the princess of my house - I wanted to be, but helplessness is not as empowering as fortitude and resourcefulness. I still want to take care of these things behind the scenes so my children feel secure like I did at their age. But I’m also aware now that they need to know these things by the time they leave the nest. I need to show them a little at a time, so they don’t have to figure it all out as adults, when the list of responsibilities can feel overwhelming.

To remind myself and to teach my children what needs doing, I’ve made a list and a schedule of household maintenance tasks along with the how to, tips, and tricks I’ve learned over the years. It’s probably missing a lot of things and I’ll be adding to it over time, but I hope it will help those who are perhaps new to home ownership, or those who are ready to take care of things themselves. It’s not as hard as it seems. Our education is not over after schooling is complete or when we settle down to raise a family. There is always more to learn, more skill to gain, more resourcefulness to develop - we never really arrive. And isn’t that a good thing? 

Grab your FREE copy of my Fix it Mama Household Basics HERE. 

What else we could we add to this list? What have you learned about taking care of a home that you could share with us?

Our Favorite Fall Books

It's almost that time of year - my favorite season, when sunlight glows a little warmer and the air cools. I start to crave roast chicken and apple pie along with the rhythm of school routines. We pull out the "Fall Box" and the children oh and ah over fall decor and the favorite fall picture books that we only take out this time of year. As teens, they still pour over them, losing themselves in memories of their younger days, when they spent hours cuddled on the couch listening to these stories read aloud. One of the BEST traditions a family can have is that of shared story time. It creates connection like nothing else. 

I talk a lot about creating lasting connections with our children in my course, "10 Ways to Create a Magical Childhood for your Children". It's full of ideas and encouragement - everything from giving kids chores to decorating your home so it's a place everyone wants to be. Booklists are one of the resources in the course and this is my favorite - The Fall Booklist. If you’re curious about these titles but want a bit more information (and a little read-aloud), check out the videos at the bottom of this page. You can find these books at your local library or at the Amazon affiliate links below. So, make some warm cider, cuddle up and enjoy these classics with a child you love.

The Apple Pie That Papa Baked

By Lauren Thompson

Too Many Pumpkins

By Linda White

Pumpkin Moonshine

By Tasha Tudor

Goody O'Grumpity

By Carol Brink

Now It's Fall (Lois Lenski Books)

By Lois Lenski

The Lonely Scarecrow

By Tim Preston, Maggie Kneen

Scarecrow

By Cynthia Rylant

Leaf Man

By Lois Ehlert

Fletcher and the Falling Leaves

By Julia Rawlinson

The Little Old Lady Who Was Not Afraid of Anything

By Linda Williams

My Monster Mama Loves Me So

By Laura Leuck

The Very First Thanksgiving Day

By Rhonda Gowler Greene

Over in the Hollow

By Rebecca Dickinson

Learning to LOVE an old, tired kitchen

I woke up this morning thinking about my kitchen for some reason. Maybe it was because I've been surprised this week by how every meal I cook for my family is devoured within 5 minutes with no leftovers to be had. #teenagedboys 

But then I thought about my stove - and the kitchen as a whole. It's a happy place. No, it's not big or new or gourmet at all. My stovetop is a 40" electric cooktop with push buttons from the 1970's.  The electric elements are hanging on by some frayed loose wires and the coils come loose and get tilted sometimes (then I have to take metal tongs, grab the hot element and set it straight again). The countertops surrounding the stove are butcher block formica - indestructible. I often wish for a new gas range and a spacious area to prep the meals I make there but, when I have that someday, I think I will miss this little workspace. It's been the scene of many happy moments and the fact that I've created so many meals for my children on that stove makes it special. 

Is there a place in your home that you hate? One that feels so behind the times or so NOT your style that you wish you could change it? There are two things that have helped me through this discontent with my kitchen.

1) Make it cheerful in some way by incorporating things you love. I have old 1950's cabinets and ripped linoleum* on the floor. So, to distract me from these disappointing parts, I painted the lower cabinets a happy turquoise - one of my favorite colors (which to me looks like a 1950's color so I'm not completely crazy, right?) I painted the walls a warm yellow and found a few decor items that catch the eye and draw attention away from the old floors (big peacock poster, little cake stand). My daughter made a little banner that hangs over the window and I made a valance with fabric that pulls all the colors together.

2) Think about the moments you've had in that space with your family. I recall nourishing meals cooked there, a gaggle of kids packing their lunches, two tired coffee lovers jockeying for their turn with the pour over and kettle, and the gatherings where 12 people have crowded into the tiny space to hold hands and bless the meal. When the REAL things fill a space, it becomes a happy place. 

You do not need a gourmet kitchen to make delicious food for your family.

Get people in there and make memories together.

Emily's banner reminds me of what matters.

Here's how it looked when we moved in.

*The linoleum is ripped because in a moment of DIY optimism my youngest daughter and I pretended we were on HGTV and pulled up part of the sheet of linoleum hoping to uncover "Hardwood floors!" but we only found lots of glue and plywood. Back went the linoleum which was now ripped by our enthusiasm. So, yeah, we have linoleum floors and they are now ripped. 

I had a moment of panic the other day as heard the furnace kick on in the early morning hours. "What if the furnace breaks? How would I afford to fix it?" What calmed me down in this moment of overwhelm was the truth that EVERYTHING THAT REALLY MATTERS CANNOT BE TAKEN FROM ME. Love and joy and the relationships I have with my children are the real things. Even if I couldn't afford to fix the furnace or had to sell this house and move somewhere more affordable, I would still have the things that matter. Only LOVE is real, everything else is just stuff.  I hope this encourages you as you find ways to love the home you are in and to relish the REAL things that happen there.  

For more ideas about creating a Home you Love, check out my PORTFOLIO or my COURSES.